I Don't Exist - The Random Rants of Franklin James Phillips: Happy Birth...

Bridge to Nowhere: Anger and the Laws of Physics

Well, it's not ever day that I get told that I need to "get a fucking job." Actually, to be perfectly frank, I'VE NEVER BEEN TOLD THAT.

Is it petty to respond harshly to someone who treats you harshly when they know nothing about you? Perhaps I'm missing something.

There's a certain sub-human that works locally. Obviously I can't name this guy, because as I'm sure most of you know, laws are in place to protect such scumbags, and if I name-drop I could get sued for libel and slander.

Forget about the fact this certain dirt-bag who must remain nameless judged and slandered ME without knowing ANYTHING ABOUT ME. That is of course irrelevant.

What's important is that I am being "PETTY" because I am giving him satisfaction. What matters is how I responded. Obviously I am just as bad as he is, because I allowed him to get under my skin.

I suppose it wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't been so quick to REACT. So quick to prove that I am no better, or worse than he is. This guy commented on something I had posted in the "thespian lovers" group, and lets just say it wasn't exactly complimentary. Not only was it not complimentary, but it was completely IGNORANT and without merit. Worse even. It was condescending. IT WAS VULGAR. I was so livid that I was TWITCHING.

I've got a job, okay? In fact I have SEVERAL. It's just that the cumulative incomes of all of them don't amount to enough to where I can keep up with certain things without occasional assistance from friends, and loved ones, but I ALWAYS PAY EVERYONE BACK. I AM taking steps to correct that problem.

Why would I be making hundred mile round trips to LA if that wasn't the case?

Ignorance, consistency and hypocrisy are going to be the three colors of kryptonite that destroy me in this business. I do NOT respond well to them. The aforementioned party that passed judgement on me today is far from perfect. In fact he is the POLAR OPPOSITE of perfection, and I guarantee you he knows that better than anybody else. So, rather than make efforts to correct the faults (like I do) he SLINGS MUD on people that have DONE NOTHING TO HIM.

I've heard NOTHING but horror stories about this person. I had long since promised myself that I would NEVER work with him based solely on the incidents I had heard of from multiple sources of his ill-treatment of certain people in the artistic community that I've come to respect, admire, and even love. I was very fortunate in that he had never crossed me personally.

Today that changed. It will NEVER cease to fascinate me how quickly just a few simple words from a person worth less than sewer vermin can tear to shreds years of confidence in one's hard-work, and their network of accolades. The irony is I just saw this dude in a show, and even though I knew what kind of douche bag he is I STILL had favorable things to say about his work. I was willing to walk a mile in his shoes, and STILL give him the benefit of the doubt.

NEVER AGAIN. This prick JUDGED me without DOING ANY RESEARCH. He KNOWS NOTHING, and will CONTINUE TO KNOW NOTHING. He is DUST. He is AIR. He is ANTIMATTER.

I was infuriated, and still am, but now I'm more embarrassed than anything else. Is that fair to me? I don't think so. This person pushed my buttons and I responded accordingly. They've managed to prove that I am on the same level as them. The very idea makes me want to VOMIT. Especially given that it's probably true.

I've been told that "he who is hurting OWNS the problem." Sometimes it's true. In this instance it's not. This guy ROBBED me of my day, and I am BEYOND livid that I am not being allowed to even RANT to my closest friends about it. How dare you?

This is why artists become hateful. This is why people get arrogant. It doesn't just materialize out of thin air. We have to get PROVOKED. There is only so much bullshit I'm going to listen to before I bite back. Today I bit back. Basic law of physics: For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

I love my friends. That is never going to change. And why is that? Because my friends love me, that's why. Simple common courtesy. It's a pisser that certain third-grade dropouts never pick that up. I guess common sense isn't something you can be taught. It's either there, or its not.

I may be NUTS. I may have a short-fuse, and I realize that I act obnoxious, abrasive and spoiled most of the time. This person that crossed me today is all of those things and more, but I have one talent that he lacks. It's common sense. You don't BITE the hand that feeds you. I once paid hard earned money to see HIM perform. True, it was mostly by default, because I was really there to see my friends who were also in the cast, but the bottom line is I coughed up hard-earned dough to watch a play that had HIS name in the program. So, I paid for HIS show. Whether he got paid to do the part or not is immaterial. Now, I ask for help, and this miserable pile of FILTH is telling me to "GET A JOB?" He needs to GET A SOUL.

He can go STRAIGHT TO HELL.

OPEN LETTER TO THE ARTISTIC HATER OF ART!!!

Here we go again. We've all heard the adage that opinions are like assholes. We all know that joke. I GET IT. Opinions are fine. I don't mind discussing things with somebody and sharing and exchanging ideas as to why something might or might not have worked with a specific art form, or with a specific piece of theatre. All I ask is that you please KNOW what the hell you are talking about. Be familiar with the material for the love of CHRIST. Perhaps you could actually, oh, I don't know … SEE THE SHOW THAT YOU ARE HATING ON? If you ask me to describe something I've done, don't roll your eyes, scoff, and nay-say when I begin to do so. It's annoying as hell, because I know you wouldn't have that opinion if you'd actually seen the damn thing yourself. You too are an artist, damn it. You also work in the theatre. You too are SUPPOSED to be IMAGINATIVE. Don't dismiss something that you've not seen. Don't tell me "Oh, well, I just KNOW THE SHOW, that's all. I've seen other productions." This is horseshit on so many levels. Okay, you've seen many different versions in various theatres. I get that. Good for you. That's not always necessarily the same as actually being IN THE SHOW. That's not the same as actually READING, and possibly MEMORIZING part of the script, and I happen to know for a fact that you've NEVER BEEN IN THIS SHOW.

How do I know that to be true? First: because you told me in the past. Second, because you are telling me there are specific things said within the context of the script that refer to specific dates and times, which would make placing the story in a different time period not work. I happen to know for a FACT that that is not the case. Things are mentioned in the PAST-TENSE, but no YEAR is ever mentioned. Not even a month for that matter. Maybe it's in the original stage-directions. Maybe it's mentioned within the author-notes of the original playwright, but the AUDIENCE DOESN'T SEE THAT. Yeah, I was just IN THE SHOW, that's all. I've read the script cover to cover probably about sixty times, been in rehearsals with the rest of the cast, watched and listened to them SAY THE LINES OVER AND OVER, and then I did several (gasp) PERFORMANCES of the show where I HEARD THE SAME LINES OVER AND OVER, so UM ... yeah, I probably know what I'm talking about. I just MIGHT be a little bit more familiar with the play than you are. Sorry, but it's a fact. Imagine that. If you saw the show, and you hated it, fine. I'm all ears as to why you didn't care for it. We'll have a nice drink over it, and call it a day, but if you didn't actually see it, I'm not interested. And don't tell me what you "heard," either. I'm not interested in what you heard. It's the telephone game. He said she said. Got no use for it. If you weren't in that audience, then your opinion means NOTHING. IT DOESN'T EXIST. All you have is a theory, and a theory doesn't affect the price of oil.

FIN!!!

JANUARY 4TH, 2015: "Happy" New Year, Indeed >:(

I just love how sometimes when you see some people that you work with making a scene, something that is getting out of hand, something that is becoming a spectacle, and is making everyone in the room uncomfortable, when you step in and try to defuse the situation, YOU suddenly become the person to get abused, targeted and humiliated for it. People gang up on YOU and attack YOU, and turn YOU into a scapegoat. They blatantly, and deliberately say things to embarrass, undervalue, and objectify your own emotions, and opinions. Then when you attempt to retreat from the situation, you are made to feel like even LESS of a human being. You are told to "get over it," or "SUCK IT UP." Oh, really?

So, I should "SUCK IT UP," eh? You mean like the rest of you idiots were "sucking it up" moments ago when you were taking part in your public pissing contest?

It will never cease to amuse me how often I get treated like I'm about nine years old by people who think they are "more advanced" socially than I am, and that they continually need to "correct that spoiled little shit." Oh, "Yeah, Travis is talented, but sometimes he has tamper-tantrums, and you need to 'put him in his place.'" Great, so it's okay for you fuck-nuts to bust heads and lock horns, but when I do it, I'm immature, and I'm petty. Is that it? Well, here is an "adult response" for all of you:

FUCK YOU!!! Each and every one of you can BLOW IT OUT YOUR ASSES. Even a mental vegetable could see that I have a better sense of reality than any of the rest of you put together. 

They say "no good deed goes unpunished," and this adage more than fits the situation I was in last night. I guess I should have seen it coming. Now that my best friend in the company has been summarily kicked to the curb, these vultures need another person to push around. Might as well be me, right?

I totally get why certain members of the theatre are routinely quiet now. Maybe it's time I learned from their example. Maybe I shouldn't even express my opinions at all. Why should I? It's just a business after all. From now on I'm keeping my stupid trap SHUT. The next time I see a situation start to flare up I won't say anything. I'll just stand there and watch the building "burn to the FUCKING GROUND," so to speak. It's going to give me a great deal of satisfaction later when those same people that have been giving me shit come back and ask me "Travis, why didn't do something? You were standing right there." and I can say back to them "Because I've warned you people numerous times in the past about your behavior, and you thanked me for it by chewing my head off. Well, never again. This is your bed of roses. You made it. You sleep in it, and enjoy those THORNS while your at it." 

The Diamond Bullet: Volume 1

Hey, everyone! Look what I found. It's a picture of my favorite edition of the Holy Bible.

I'm My Own Atheist

Alright, kids! I’ve been seeing a few things on the old Facebook news-feed that have been pissing me off, lately. As much as I’d like to delete my profile and flip everyone the bird, I’m stuck. Unfortunately, being an actor does require one to maintain a certain element of two-facedness. I’m not even remotely famous enough yet to where I can get away with expressing too much bile and hatred without being black-balled from the artistic community altogether. That’s why I keep this blog. It’s separate from my FB profile entirely, and so far it seems no one reads it. This obviously serves as a kind of double-edged sword. I've no one to stroke my extremely needy ego, but I’m also safe to spew off as much hate as may tickle my fancy without fear of repercussion from any casting directors that might have their prying eyes on my Facebook status and latest tweets. So, here’s goes.

As the title of this article suggests, I am indeed an atheist. I've been one for some time. I won’t bore you with the tiny details. Just suffice to say it works for me, and I’m happy with my discovery. As most of you know an atheist essentially does not believe in the existence of a supreme being, and more often than not it follows that said person does not practice any kind of religion whatsoever. That’s not to say that I am not indeed spiritual. I have a passion for my art, and all the ritualistic practices that go with it.

Having said that, I’m not just ANY atheist.  I’m my own Atheist. By that I mean I still hold onto my principals. I’m polite, respectful, courteous, and I can coexist with my religious neighbors. To me that is what a true atheist is. That is, someone who truly realizes in the strictest sense that no religious stimuli from any source can possibly affect them. Why? Because it’s just fantasy, that’s why.

In other words, just because you are atheist doesn't mean you have to get in the faces of god fearing people and tell them they need to get a fucking life or blow it out their ass. Atheists don’t need to bellyache and whine about the Ten Commandments being displayed in a courthouse. Atheists don’t need to constantly shoot their damn mouths off about war memorials that feature Stars of David, and Crucifixes. It doesn’t affect us. No atheist with any common sense is going to waste their time starting a campaign to have large crosses removed from freeway hillsides because it “infringes upon their own civil liberties,” and makes them feel “uncomfortable.” Again, crosses don’t affect us. It's just an object. 

Constantly second-guessing other people who have developed a long standing belief-system based on upbringing, or years of personal experience is not being an atheist. That’s just being an ASSHOLE! Plain and simple. You have atheism, and then you have ASSHOLISM. Unfortunately, most celebrity atheists fall into this latter lunatic fringe of the atheist community.

Listen, if you are a school teacher that also happens to be an atheist, then you are at an advantage. Good for you. Your job should be easier. You are not allowed to talk about god at work, and that’s fine, because you would never want to anyway.

However, you do not have the right to walk up to students who are giving a prayer of thanks over their lunch in the cafeteria and say to them “Hey, quit that. This is a public school.” You can’t do that. If a student pulls out a tiny bible during reading period and begins to leaf through it you cannot say to that student, “Put that away, I don’t wanna see it.” You are not allowed to do that, either. It’s against the law, and it’s downright rude. That student is protected by the first amendment. That is freedom of religion. You may think, “Well, isn't that a double standard?” Nah, it’s not. I’ll explain why. You are being paid to be there. They are not. The law requires that they be there. No truant officers are going to come knocking on your door if you someday decide to quit being a teacher. That’s your prerogative. Students don’t have that option. They are there because the state says they have to be there. Let them have their little alone time with their little comic book that’s got a cross on the cover, and get on with your work. Once again, this does not affect you.

If you hand out a writing assignment to your students asking them to write about a “hero” in their lives, and an eight year old girl picks Jesus Christ, more power to her. It’s not your place to grade her based on her opinions and her religious beliefs. Separation of Church and State, remember? That means you can’t discuss religion with the kids AT ALL, regardless of whether it’s favorable, or NEGATIVE. If the kid writes about Jesus, then the kid writes about Jesus. That is that. Here’s what you look for as a teacher. You look for spelling errors. You check for good grammar, punctuation, capitalization, and sentence structure. See if the narrative flows smoothly. Then if there’s time you see if she put her name and the date in the top right hand corner of the page. If that is said and done then you are good to go. You give a decent grade and you move along to the next student. You don’t write in BIG FUCKING RED LETTERS at the top of page “Don’t talk about Jesus.” You don’t demean, humiliate, undervalue, and objectify a child like that. You just don’t do it. If any teacher reading this does not share this view then that teacher has no business being in a classroom. They have no business around children at all for that matter. That is a cold, calculating, condescending, and narrow-minded individual that would probably be much better suited to making pretzels for a living. Pretzels don’t have feelings, unless of course you feel like you are playing God when you make them. That might be different.

Anyway the point is that a true atheist should be just that. An atheist and that’s it. It should only apply to you and you alone. Leave everybody else the fuck out of it. Unless they ask you for an opinion, then by all means open your trap and fire away. That’s my system. Assholism is an entirely different thing. It’s when not only do you not believe a God exists, but you hate the concept of worshiping a God SO much that you hate everybody who does worship God. Not only are you an atheist, but you spend your every waking moment trying to turn everyone else into an atheist also. You are combative, arrogant, and egotistical. You are insulting. You are vicious to people. You make veiled threats. In behaving that way you have become your own worst enemy. You are demonstrating all of the worst qualities of the very kinds of people you are fighting against. It’s like saying “keep that religion shit out of my face. Now, you better not believe in ANY of that mumbo jumbo on MY watch or I’ll burn you at the stake. Here’s a copy of National Geographic. There’s an article in there about evolution. READ THAT INSTEAD, OR I’LL BOX YOUR EARS.” You are now the shining and glowing example of everything that is wrong with organized religion. Congratulations! Want a statue? Here’s an Academy Award. That should suffice.

Alls I’m saying is try to honor the very essence of why atheists exist. We beg, and we plead the nut-balls that pound on our doors and shove copies of Watch Tower in our hands at the bus stops each day to please keep it to themselves. Why should we sink to their standards?

What makes us any better? Just be courteous. If you’re like me, and you don’t believe there is a God, good for you, but unless you’re provoked, keep it to yourself.

Barack Obama continuously compared to Hitler on FB, Twatter, and other social networks. What is wrong with this picture?

Okay, you fucks. I've kept my silence about this for long enough. Last time I checked, Barack Obama did not kill six million Jews. There also doesn't seem to be any evidence that he wiped out 1.8 to 1.9 million non-Jews from Poland. Furthermore, I haven't been able to locate any information that proves he's murdered around 500,000 to 1.2 million Serbs. To my knowledge, there also aren't any leads supposing that he is responsible for the deaths of about 800,000 Roma & Sinti, 300,000 handicapped people, approximately 200,000 Freemasons, 100,000 communists, between 10,000 and 25,000 homosexuals, or 2,000 Jehovah's Witnesses, either. Trust me, I've looked. Sorry, my conservative pig friends, but the information just isn't there. Go ahead and look for it yourself if you don't believe me. I defy you to find facts that our current President did any of these things. If you've got something show it to me. I'll eat my words.

Yet these idiots. These knuckle dragging dip-shits. These fuckwads who have obviously not read a single book in their entire god damned lives. These kindergarten drop-outs. These freaks who got straight D minuses in all of their history classes through school if they were lucky. They continue to post these psychotic memes on FB, and Twitter issuing "warnings" about Obama. I keep seeing these insane Photoshop images with Barack having a tiny black mustache. People shouting and screaming in front of Post Offices saying things like "He's Hitler. He's Hitler. He's a Dictator. Genocide, ruthless, totalitarian regime, police state" blah blah blah, yadda yadda yadda, bellyache bellyache bellyache.

HEY, IF YOU'RE DOING THAT, FUCK YOU!!!

THAT SHIT HAS GOT TO STOP. IT'S NOT FUCKING FUNNY, OKAY?

People were saying this about Bush too. I didn't like it then, either. It's offensive, and IT'S BULLSHIT. Plain and simple! I don't want to see it on my newsfeed, and I sure as FUCK don't want it on my wall. I will immediately unfriend and BLOCK anybody that puts something like that on my Facebook page. And mark me. If I see you on the street-I WILL BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF YOU, because you are an ignorant FUCKTARD and you are unfit to breath. Is that clear enough for you? Maybe that's being too dictator-like. I wouldn't want to come off as a Hitler, or anything like that.

The END!!!