OPEN LETTER TO THE ARTISTIC HATER OF ART!!!

Here we go again. We've all heard the adage that opinions are like assholes. We all know that joke. I GET IT. Opinions are fine. I don't mind discussing things with somebody and sharing and exchanging ideas as to why something might or might not have worked with a specific art form, or with a specific piece of theatre. All I ask is that you please KNOW what the hell you are talking about. Be familiar with the material for the love of CHRIST. Perhaps you could actually, oh, I don't know … SEE THE SHOW THAT YOU ARE HATING ON? If you ask me to describe something I've done, don't roll your eyes, scoff, and nay-say when I begin to do so. It's annoying as hell, because I know you wouldn't have that opinion if you'd actually seen the damn thing yourself. You too are an artist, damn it. You also work in the theatre. You too are SUPPOSED to be IMAGINATIVE. Don't dismiss something that you've not seen. Don't tell me "Oh, well, I just KNOW THE SHOW, that's all. I've seen other productions." This is horseshit on so many levels. Okay, you've seen many different versions in various theatres. I get that. Good for you. That's not always necessarily the same as actually being IN THE SHOW. That's not the same as actually READING, and possibly MEMORIZING part of the script, and I happen to know for a fact that you've NEVER BEEN IN THIS SHOW.

How do I know that to be true? First: because you told me in the past. Second, because you are telling me there are specific things said within the context of the script that refer to specific dates and times, which would make placing the story in a different time period not work. I happen to know for a FACT that that is not the case. Things are mentioned in the PAST-TENSE, but no YEAR is ever mentioned. Not even a month for that matter. Maybe it's in the original stage-directions. Maybe it's mentioned within the author-notes of the original playwright, but the AUDIENCE DOESN'T SEE THAT. Yeah, I was just IN THE SHOW, that's all. I've read the script cover to cover probably about sixty times, been in rehearsals with the rest of the cast, watched and listened to them SAY THE LINES OVER AND OVER, and then I did several (gasp) PERFORMANCES of the show where I HEARD THE SAME LINES OVER AND OVER, so UM ... yeah, I probably know what I'm talking about. I just MIGHT be a little bit more familiar with the play than you are. Sorry, but it's a fact. Imagine that. If you saw the show, and you hated it, fine. I'm all ears as to why you didn't care for it. We'll have a nice drink over it, and call it a day, but if you didn't actually see it, I'm not interested. And don't tell me what you "heard," either. I'm not interested in what you heard. It's the telephone game. He said she said. Got no use for it. If you weren't in that audience, then your opinion means NOTHING. IT DOESN'T EXIST. All you have is a theory, and a theory doesn't affect the price of oil.

FIN!!!